Tag Archives: Lochte

Free Ryan Lochte!

I just knew something was fishy about Lochte’s recant.

Turns out, YES, he was robbed–or more accurately, shaken down–by the mafioso posing as police in Brazil.

I knew it!

And no, he didn’t vandalize anything.

So why did he recant?

Because his experience contradicted the ultra-national, corpo-fascist narrative–namely, that the Olympics are some sort of divine, religious rite. For an Olympian to suggest the reality that Brazil is a corrupt, socialist, banana-republic is blasphemy to the religion of the Olympiads. It is improbable that Lochte has any skills that could elicit the remunerations he garners as a swimmer. Unfortunately for him, he has only one possible employer: the ultra-national, corpo-fascist, Olympic bureaucracy. The high priests forced him to  recant…to prostrate himself and affirm his subservience to the Olympic religion, “I lied. Brazil is a socialist paradise!” If he refused to do this, he would be broken on the rack of financial ruin.

Some of us proles can think for ourselves, Ryan. We support you.

Lochte

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